Dating is always complicated, there’s no doubt about that. However, when you’re over 70, recently widowed, or maybe even divorced after a very long marriage, dating is downright scary. How do you meet people your own age? How do you connect with someone new after being with someone else for so long? How do you start facing your twilight years with someone who isn’t already acquainted with your unique challenges? The list of questions and doubts can go on and on.
Remember that if you’re asking yourself these questions, the person you’re dating is probably asking them too. These questions can be daunting to someone over 70 who is just stepping back into the market, and if they aren’t handled with a little extra care, you could easily scare away a catch. Dating a man over 70 can be an exciting and challenging adventure, but you must approach it with the right attitude. Here are a few tips to help you ease into a relationship with a man in his senior years.
1. Remember that they are nervous too
Always remember that, as nervous as you are, they’re probably just as nervous. He has been out of the dating game for years as well. He likely has recently been divorced or widowed just like you. He has more health challenges than he used to just like you. Keeping this in mind can not only help to settle your strained nerves, but it will remind you to treat him the way you hope to be treated. Sometimes, when you’re feeling anxious, it helps to focus on helping someone else. Keep your mind on the task of helping him enjoy himself, and soon you’ll find that you’ve forgotten all about your nerves.
2. Don’t Start With the Heavy Stuff
When you’re older and looking to find a love connection, there is a temptation to rush past the seemingly unimportant things like flirting and pleasantries. This is a mistake, because people don’t start with deep and meaningful connections, they start with simple pleasures that build into something stronger over time. Don’t overwhelm him with heath and economic issues early on. Every situation is different, but as a general rule of thumb, wait until the third date before broaching very personal subjects, and even then you shouldn’t spend too much time on that.
3. He’s Not Made Of Glass
While you do have to treat men of a certain age with a little more sensitivity, you should also keep in mind that men have an inherent desire to be seen as capable and strong. Obviously women share this desire, although it often manifests itself in different ways, but there are few better ways to turn a man off than by treating him like he’s made of glass. You don’t have to patronize him, just pay attention to his strengths, and acknowledge them.
Dating doesn’t have to be stressful and scary. There is always a certain level of risk involved, and after a certain age the challenges change; but with the right attitude, you can greatly improve your chances of success. Be safe, don’t lose hope, and always remember to have fun and enjoy your life.